Greetings fans, SC here. (uh oh, it’s an SC post…probably short with bad news, where’s my Content! I’m bored!)

I actually have been planning to do a post or two since PuzzlePaws and myself are now Sheltering-in-Place (vs. me leaving the house to work).  Basically, I got laid-off. It’s more complicated than that, but it isn’t germane to PuzzlePaws’s blog, so I decline to digress.

Y’know how you’ve got that Really Nice bath stuff you’ve been hiding in the closet for a rainy day? (Our stash is a bit large, ATM.) Well, since we’re all stuck at home anyway, now is the time to use it!

Being stuck in the house is no fun for anyone, add in the current pandemic and it is a recipe for stress.  What better way to remove some of that stress than to break into your stash and have an enjoyable bath?  (Now you see where I’m going with this.)

Now, I will take the odd bubblebath or use a bathbomb once in a while, and while those are enjoyable I wanted to truly relax.  I needed something that literally felt like it pulled the stress out of me.  So, I dug deep into the closet and found a favorite that PuzzlePaws and I discovered at ToyFair NYC about 2 or 3 years ago: Ooze Baff.

If you are familiar with the works of Anne McCaffrey, specifically her Crystal Singer series, you remember the odd, viscous liquid called Radiant Bath. (Hint: the Crystal Singers would immerse themselves in it to take out some of the crystal song in their blood when fresh off the Ranges. I’ll post a link to the first book at the bottom, cracking good read, that. The audiobook is perfect for the bath to come.)

What you will need:

• Ooze Baff 50g or 150g
• Bathing tub to fill with hot water (Do not use in a hot tub or anything with a pump in it.  Puzzlepaws Blog is not responsible for damage)
• Hands-free entertainment (I used some music I enjoy)
• Optional: Candle(s) for mood lighting
• Optional: Epsom Salts (to thicken the Baff)

Before drawing your bath (baff?), make sure your drain is clear of anything that might cause it to drain slowly.  (Other than PuzzlePaws, everyone else in the house has long hair.  Cleaning the tub/shower drain is a monthly exercise.) Once you have cleaned your drain and reassembled the plug, draw about 2-3 inches of warm water.  Before opening your package of Ooze Baff, make sure none of the powder is clumped together, if it is clumped up, break it up in the package.

Open the pouch of Ooze Baff and sprinkle it all over the surface of the water, a bath will take a minimum of 50-75g to create.  (Ideally, use 100-150g of powder per bath for the best experience.)  Stir the water with your hand until the powder is fully dissolved.  The water will turn the color of the powder and will smell slightly sulfurous. (This is the only design flaw I have found.  I have not experimented with adding scent/oil to the water to “improve” the scent.  I prefer the effect, I can ignore the smell.)

Sorry, no bath pictures here.  This is a family blog.

At this time, set up your bath, start your music, etc.

Shortly, the water will feel slipperier and become noticeably thicker.  If it isn’t as thick as you’d like, or you want something else to relax your muscles, add some Epsom Salts.  Once everything is dissolved carefully “hop” in (while bracing your body, or with assistance, carefully crawl into the tub and get comfortable.)  Continue filling the tub with the hottest water you can tolerate. (I use a temperature just below “Hell, No! I’m not getting into that!”)

NEVER try to stand in a tub of Ooze Baff, you WILL slip and fall!

This is an odd chemical reaction.  The powder combines with water and creates a mucous-like slime.  Epsom Salts enhances the slime effect (thickening the slime).  It is an endothermic reaction, thus you use the hottest water you can stand. (Endothermic – the reaction absorbs heat, making the resulting fluid cooler than it was at the beginning.)

Fill the tub as deep as you like with you in it (I prefer about 1/2″ from the rim).  Rest in the water until you feel your stress melt away. Don’t get too comfy, you’re still going to have to shower this off.  (Even the least buoyant individual will feel supported.  I’m pretty low body fat and my arms floated comfortably in the bath.) Don’t worry if you get this slime in long hair, you can shower it out.  The slime will form a thin, slippery coating on your entire body.

Please use common sense, don’t use Ooze Baff if you have open wounds or are allergic to any of the compounds in it.

When you’re ready to get out, pop the drain on the tub and let it drain with you in it.  DON’T try to stand up yet.  Once the tub is drained, start the water and rinse the bottom of the tub until you have a place to stand.  Once standing, turn on the shower.  (Yes, I have been known to write manuals.) If you’ve gotten the slime in your hair, draw the slime towards the ends of your hair until you’ve gotten most of it out.  Shampoo as usual until the slime is gone.

Ooze Baff is colored-hair-safe (I have neon pink hair, the slime didn’t harm the color at all), non-staining, and easy to clean up.

Ingredients: Acrylamide/Sodium Acrylate Copolymer, Fragrance (Parfum), FD&C Yellow No. 5, FD&C Blue No. 1.

Where to buy:  Ooze Baff and related products are available on Amazon.  At this time, delivery takes about a week.  Zimpli Store on Amazon

If you want larger quantities, you can purchase it directly from the maker: zimplikids.com

Crystal Singer is available from Amazon as well: Crystal Singer by Anne McCaffrey

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